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PLAY: Who are you talking to?

ORIGIN



BOB needs to tell the madam that he's stuck between two bookshelves for—he does not know how long (in Azlan's voice)

 MADAM can't hear BOB and thinks he's something else (unconfirmed)

SETTING: work in family Kopitiam, family conflict. 

OPENING peace ambience music dim light sets the tone. suddenly Sammy and Madam comes in argument, child adds to the chaos 

ENDING: 

BOB: nose rings, wear a suit and tie, bowler hat (nervously loud speech) aware to audience, aside
20 SAMMY (offstage:?) doesn't really believe in Bob, a bit resentful... Sammy has to clean Bob up after the spill champagne, roughs him up.--- IDK why aunty spends so much on you, she could spend more time for us. >:(
50 MADAM: heavy makeup (anxious and whining)
7 CHILD: asks Bob things. Childlike way! Bob doesn't answer, but it is his favourite. YOu dont like oranges do you, i don't like oranges too! The things he likes is different from what madam likes.

_________________________________________

RED: MADAM (just come back home)
BLACK: BOB (in a terrible mood but tries his best to be polite)
GREEN: SAMMY
_________________________________________




(sighs)
Barley, Barley barley Barley=


(ignores)

(monotone) Barley, Barley barley Barley=

YES I HEAR YOU

(monotone) Barley, Barley barley Barley=

=[ BOB.]

Ah, Please, Barley, have mercy on me=


=[ IM BOB.]

[ I ] have given you everything you asked [for=

=[NO YOU DIDNT]=

=but] still I suffer your doings!

FOOL! FOOL, FOOL, FOOL!

(silence. staring into a distance)
... oh no ...
...the gate... (scratches head) 

GATE? UH....OH!
AAAAAGH MOTHER OF—

(steps back, looks away, shouts):
SAMMAAAAAAAAY CAN YOU CHECK IF I CLOSED THE  GATE OR NOT!

MADAM, IF I MAY SAY—

(Eh? Gate ke?)

YES. GATE AH! NOT THE BIG ONE, THE SMALLER GATE

O

(Ya la yalahh)

O—OKAY THANK YOU
(steps forward, looks at Bob)
(closes eyes and raises palms to shush bob in a repetitive motion):
Barley please, my family isn't doing so well now, keep my Sammy safe, I've fed you for all these years, in my humble home—

I SAY—

—have I not been a good person? Come, let me feed you. Barley, Barley... (falls to a mutter)
(proceeds to unload oranges out of the bag)

—IM NOT HUNGRY< MADAM, WOULD YOU JUST

(stuffs an orange into Bob's mouth) 
I have brought fresh oranges, your favourite...aaaand...

I HATE ORANGES
WHAT MAKES YOU PRESUME I'D ENJOY THAT—
(SEES THAT MADAM IS RUMMAGING IN BAG ONCE MORE)
OOOO NO AND DONT TAKE THEM OUT
 NO—NO—MADAM, I MUST INSIST

(finally finishes digging in bag) And here we have a fresh bottle of champagne for you—

MADAM PLEASE

(uncorks the bottle and pours contents over Bob)

(RETCHES): EUGHHH— EUHHHG— THIS ISNT EVEN DRINKABLE 

(
closes eyes and raises palms to shush bob in a repetitive motion): I'm so sorry if this does not please you, would you like something else?

YES, I WOULD. FOR STARTERS, A TOWEL WOULD BE NICE, FOR SURE, 
—AND

I-

(GLARES< ENUNCIATES)
 AAAAAND—

(closes mouth)

—AAAAAND MAYHAPS YOU CAN HELP ME—

(continues)—am really in need of help this time...

(FACEPALMS) MADAM 

—Please, Evergreen Barley .you are so, so wonderful, so dependable, If you give it to me, I promise I will donate all my tokens to SantaCommisions.

WHO? —I DON'T CARE— MADAM, I TELL YOU

(closes eyes and raises palms to shush bob in a repetitive motion): good talk, Barley, good talk. (steps back)

—I AM BOB, WHO IS THIS BARLEY CHARACTER?

(takes another orange from the bag) Here's another orange, we've come to a consensus, haven't we?

DO IT, I DARE YOU! DO I—

(stuffs Bob's mouth with the orange.)
You will bless me, won't you? Barley, you're my dearest. (uncorks champagne again and pours over Bob)

(SPLUTTERS IN FRUSTRATION)

Peace. Barley, Peace. (Goes away, footsteps fading.

(CHOKES OUT ORANGE) YES. YES. PEACE AT LAST.


(footsteps approach)
(Sammy Arrives and picks up the bottle of "champagne" left on the side):
(Turns to look at bob)
(monotone) Barney 
Barney Barney Barney Barney Barney Barney—

FAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

_________________________________________

BOB is a figurine in MDM's and SAMMY's world. (the true representation of the idea partially understood by MADAM)
TLDR: MADAM and SAMMY are praying to him.

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